


To The Last Man

by supernatural9917



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel and Dean Winchester Watch Movies, Dean has a cowboy fetish, Destiel Artists United (Supernatural), Eileen Leahy Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester, F/M, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), Sam Winchester Ships Castiel/Dean Winchester, Smut, cowboy porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 18:27:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28481655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supernatural9917/pseuds/supernatural9917
Summary: It's movie night for Dean and Cas, and not only has Cas successfully purchased beer and pie, he also found a new western for them to watch. Unfortunately, he may have missed some nuances about this particularly film...
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Eileen Leahy/Sam Winchester
Comments: 16
Kudos: 188





	To The Last Man

**Author's Note:**

> This is inspired by a real life cowboy porno, which was brought to my attention by a Tumblr post shared on the DAU Discord. The chat that followed inspired me to write this very silly bit of smut to kick off 2021 with... well, a bang!  
> And yes, I did watch the first bit of the movie and the described scenes are real XD

‘Dean! I’m back!’ Cas shouted as he came into the bunker and started down the stairs.

‘Great, I’ll make the popcorn!’ Dean called back from the library. 

It was Friday night, and Friday nights were Cas’s favourite. Sam and Eileen would always go out on a date, and Dean and Cas would stay in and hang out in the Dean Cave. Sometimes they played foosball and board games, and other times they would do a Netflix binge. Tonight was to be a movie night, and Cas had been tasked with buying beer and pie at the nearby Gas N Sip for the occasion. He was particularly proud of himself today, because not only had he gotten Dean's favourite beer and cherry pie, he had also found a movie for them to watch.

He had gone to the back of the shop to pick up a copy of Busty Asian Beauties for Dean, and found a DVD bargain bin full of movies for a dollar. Only one caught his eye, however: a western called _To The Last Man: The Gathering Storm_. He added it to his pile, but passed on the BAB, as Dean already had that issue.

Now back home, Cas went straight to the Dean Cave to get everything set up so they could start as soon as Dean brought the popcorn. Everything was laid out and he was putting the DVD into the machine when Dean came in.

‘What’re we watching?’ Dean asked through a mouthful of popcorn.

‘I found a western in the DVD bargain bin at the Gas N Sip. I thought you might like it.’

‘Sure. What’s it called?’

‘ _To The Last Man_.’

Dean shrugged. ‘Never heard of it. Probably a B movie, but those can be pretty fun.’

Cas nodded, well aware of Dean’s love of cheesy schlock. He’d made Cas sit through the entire _All Saints Day_ series, after all. Settling in on the couch with the popcorn between them, Cas pressed play.

As soon as the title sequence began, Dean snorted. ‘Raging Stallion Studios? Ha!’ He didn’t recognise any of the actors’ names, which meant it must be a really crappy B movie. Maybe even a C movie. The production values were pretty crap as well, and once the acting started, Dean chuckled again. ‘How much did you pay for this, Cas?’

‘A dollar.’

‘Not sure it’s even worth that, buddy.’

Cas frowned. ‘Would you like to watch something else instead?’

Dean waved away the suggestion. ‘Nah, let’s keep going. Maybe it’ll be like _The Room_ , so bad it’s almost good.’ 

Everything was going fine, if badly acted and filmed, until one of the cowboys got under an outdoor shower fully dressed and started grabbing his dick through his jeans. Dean choked on his beer, but Cas just tilted his head and asked, ‘Wouldn’t that chafe?’

Before Dean could recover enough to answer, the scene had thankfully moved on to the guy just washing himself with his own shirt, and Dean figured it was maybe just one of those indie films that tried to be all sensual like French ones. The guy took off the rest of his clothes, and then started jerking off.

‘Uh, Cas?’

‘Yes Dean?’

‘What kind of movie is this?’

‘Apparently it’s some kind of art film.’ Just then, jerking-off dude started in on a bottle of Jack Daniels, dribbling it on himself in what was probably meant to be a sexy way, so Dean almost bought the art film concept, but then…

‘Whoa! What the fuck!’

Cas tilted his head again and squinted harder. ‘I don’t think those bottles are safe to use for this purpose.’

‘Ya think?!’

Sensing Dean’s discomfort, Cas picked up the remote and fast-forwarded to a point beyond the man penetrating himself with a bottle. A different man was doing some blacksmithing, and then the bottle man joined him. Unfortunately, due to the heat of the smithy, that man decided to take off all his clothes again. The blacksmith eventually did the same, and then the bottle man…

‘Jesus!’ Dean shouted, grabbing the remote and stopping the DVD. ‘Cas, this is gay porn!’

'Oh. That explains why he stuck his face right into that guy's b-'

'Yeah, Cas, it does!' Dean chugged the rest of his beer and slammed the empty bottle down on the coffee table. 'Where was this bargain bin in the Gas N Sip?'

'In the back, by the magazines.'

Dean huffed a laugh. 'By the _porn_.'

'Well, yes, now that you mention it.' Cas picked at the label of his beer bottle uncomfortably. 'My apologies, I didn't realise.'

'Yeah, no kidding. Jesus.'

'Well, it's still more realistic than the other cowboy movies you've made me watch,' Cas argued defensively.

'What? How do you figure?'

'There weren't exactly a lot of women around the frontier at that time, Dean. It was very common for cowboys to masturbate, and to have sexual relationships with each other.'

Dean gaped at him. 'Are you kidding me?'

'Not at all. I mean, they probably wouldn't have done much rimming due to the lack of hygiene, but petroleum jelly was invented in the 1860s and was frequently used for anal intercourse.' Dean's face was bright red now, and he just stared at Cas with his mouth open. 'I _have_ been watching humanity for millenia, Dean.'

'And you spent that time watching cowboys fuck each other?' Dean asked with his voice choked and oddly high-pitched.

'I didn't specifically seek it out, but it happened frequently enough that I would see it sometimes.' Dean rubbed his face with his hands, shaking his head as if trying to remove the image from his mind. 'I'm sorry, you're uncomfortable.' Cas got up and took the DVD out of the machine, putting it back into its case. 'Maybe it's best if you choose the movie.'

'I don't think I'm in the mood for a movie anymore. I'm just gonna turn in.'

'Oh. OK then.' Cas couldn't hide his disappointment, and Dean stood and patted his shoulder.

'It's OK, Cas, don't worry about it. We'll do something again next week.'

'Of course, Dean. Goodnight.'

'Night.' Dean walked out without a backward glance. Cas spent a couple of minutes staring sadly down the hallway, then decided that he wouldn't let Dean's strange mood ruin movie night. Maybe Dean didn't want to watch this, but there was nothing stopping Cas from doing so. He closed the door of the Dean Cave and put the DVD back in.

An hour and several explicit sex scenes later, Cas had taken off his trenchcoat, suit jacket, tie and shirt and pushed his pants and boxers down to his ankles. He watched intently as one cowboy penetrated another on top of a bale of hay, his hand wrapped around his cock and stripping it like the penetrated man was doing. He was so focused on his task that he didn't hear the door opening.

'Look, Cas, I'm sorry that- what the fuck?!'

Cas's head snapped around to see Dean standing at the door with a fresh bowl of popcorn and a stunned expression. 'Dean!' He hurriedly grabbed his discarded clothes to cover his lap.

'Fuck! Sorry, I… sorry!' Dean said, dropping the bowl and running away down the hall.

'Fuck,' Cas muttered. He stopped the DVD and got dressed again, the horror of being caught literally with his pants down having been an effective boner killer. He tidied up the spilled popcorn and took it to the kitchen to throw away while he gathered the courage to apologise to Dean. Taking a deep breath, he knocked on Dean's door. 'Dean, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have been doing that in a shared space. I didn't expect you to come back.' There was no reply, so he opened the door. 'Dean?'

'Agh! Fuck!' Dean shouted as he came all over his own chest and stomach. 'Cas!'

'Oh, oh god, Dean, I'm so sorry,' Cas said, frozen in place with shock. 

Dean quickly grabbed his sheet to cover himself and yanked off his headphones. 'What the fuck, Cas? Can't a man have some privacy in his own fucking room?'

'I'm sorry, you didn't answer me when I knocked.' 

'Had my headphones on,' Dean muttered, face bright red. 'You still shouldn't just walk in like that. Who knows what I could be doing in here?'

'Well, I suppose you could be doing what you were doing,' Cas said sheepishly.

'Exactly! Some of us actually do that in the privacy of our bedrooms!'

'I'm sorry, Dean. That's why I came here. To apologise for… that.'

'Yeah, well, just don't let it happen again.' Dean leaned over the side of the bed to grab his t-shirt, and in so doing, accidentally pulled his headphones out of his laptop. Pornographic sounds came out of the computer speakers, which made Dean's eyes grow wide in terror while Cas's narrowed in suspicion. 

'Is that…' Dean tried to grab for his laptop, but Cas got there first. As he suspected, the scene playing was one he had seen himself less than an hour earlier. 'You were masturbating to this?'

'Well, so were you.' Dean slammed the laptop shut and crossed his arms defensively but didn't meet Cas's eyes.

'Yes, but I'm sexually and romantically attracted to men.' 

Dean's head snapped up. 'You are?'

'Why else would I masturbate to gay porn?' Cas asked dryly, then seemed to understand what that implied for Dean. 'Oh.'

'Jesus.' Dean buried his face into his hands, feeling completely humiliated.

'I see. You didn't want me to know.' Cas's shoulders slumped. 'It's OK, Dean. I wouldn't have expected you to feel the same even if I'd known you were attracted to men. I know that you don't…' He trailed off, unable to complete the painful sentence.

'Feel the same as what?' Dean asked harshly.

'The same as I do.'

'What do you mean?'

'It's fine, Dean, really. I hope this won't negatively affect our friendship.' He started to walk away, but Dean's hand shot out and grabbed his wrist.

'Cas. What do you mean?'

'I mean…' Cas sighed. 'The romantic feelings I have for you.'

'For _me_?'

'No, Dean,' Cas replied sarcastically, 'for the many other people I've betrayed heaven and given up armies for. Of course for you.' Dean made a strange little noise in his throat. 'I'll go away for a while, give you some space.' He tried to walk away, but Dean held on tightly.

'Cas.'

'Yes?'

Dean tried to talk, but instead shook his head and pulled Cas onto the bed. They stared at each other for a few seconds, then without quite knowing who made the first move, their lips crashed together. 'Cas, Cas,' Dean mumbled against Cas's mouth between kisses. 'Wanted you so bad. Always want you.'

'Dean. Please,' Cas whimpered. 

'What do you want, Cas?'

'Anything. Everything. You.'

'You got me, sweetheart. You got me.'

When Sam and Eileen returned from their date, they stopped into the Dean Cave to say hello, but while the TV was on, the room was empty. Sam walked over to the coffee table and picked up the DVD case. 'Uh… what the hell?' 

Eileen came up next to him and he showed her the box. Her eyebrows shot up. 'Is that porn?'

'Raging Stallion Studios? It's definitely porn.' He flipped it over and read the back. 'It's _gay_ porn.'

'So do you think they finally…' Eileen made a rude sign that even someone with no knowledge of ASL would have understood.

'Only one way to find out.' 

Sam put the box back, and they crept down the hallway to the bedrooms. When they approached Dean's room, Sam heard a rhythmic squeaking and thumping, followed by Dean shouting, 'Yee haw!' 

'Yep,' he said with a smirk, repeating the hand gesture. 'Sounds like Dean's cowboy fetish is in full swing.'

'Finally,' Eileen sighed. 'Come on, let's give them some privacy.' She grabbed Sam's hand and dragged him back to their room. 

'What's the hurry?' Sam teased when they got inside and Eileen slammed him against the door.

'I'm just suddenly feeling inspired to have some cowgirl action myself.'

By the time Dean shuffled into the kitchen the next morning, Sam was out on his morning run and Eileen was having breakfast. She pushed a cup of coffee in his direction. 'Mornin',' he mumbled and signed before gratefully taking the mug.

'Morning. Feeling a bit saddlesore today?'

Dean spit out the coffee. 'What?' he spluttered.

'You and Cas seemed to have a good "movie night" last night,' she smirked, air quotes and all. 'I hope you don't mind that I borrowed the DVD. It's not Sam's thing, but I thought it sounded very interesting.'

'The acting isn't very good,' Cas warned her, walking into the kitchen and kissing Dean on the cheek. 'But the plot is surprisingly compelling.'

'I bet it is.'

Cas winked at her and grabbed a coffee for himself. 'Come on, Dean, let's go back to bed.' He extended his hand, and a very bewildered Dean took it and started stumbling after him.

'Oh, boys,' Eileen called out, and they both turned to look at her. 'Yee haw!'


End file.
